Are you having a fear/worry episode or a panic attack right now? If you are having a full panic attack, first practice breathing very slowly. See this wikipedia article for breathing exercises.
Let’s begin your worksheet with a few questions. Please get a pen and paper and write down your answers fully. This worksheet works best with a single isolated incident. For ongoing problems like an abusive husband or crappy job, see Dealing Worksheet:
- What exactly are you worried about or afraid of?
Describe the entire scenario, and list the possible outcomes, with your worst fear as #1. Go ahead, spill all of your “What if’s….” right here.
- Is it something that already happened?
(If no, skip to #3) Can you fix/repair or undo it to any extent?
- Tell me what YOU can do to fix it if it has already happened. If “nothing” is your answer, skip ahead to #5. Otherwise, spell it out in detail, what you will do. Number the steps and take your time.
- Can you do that right now? When can you do that? (If “now”, please complete this entire worksheet, then directly carry out your plan.)
- Is it something that might happen?
Can you prevent or control any portion of the outcome?
- Tell me what YOU can do to prevent it, or reduce the problem. If “nothing” is your answer, skip ahead to #5. Otherwise, spell it out in detail, what actions you will take. Number the steps and take your time.
- When can you carry out this/these actions? (If “now”, please complete this entire worksheet, including affirmations, then directly carry out your plan.)
- Add your actions to your calendar
(from 3.1 & 3.2 above). Remember, you won’t be better prepared for what is to come by worrying about it. You have your action plan written and will use it when the time comes. (And it probably never will.)
- Next, here are the mantras and affirmations to say aloud, no less than 10 times. Yes, aloud. Yes, 10 times.
- I am a strong, capable person. I can handle issues when they come my way.
- I will handle only the problems I can, and be at peace with my limitations.
- I am an empowered person. I am smart and resourceful. I am competent and confident. I handle problems with ease.
- I am resourceful and thoughtful. I am insightful. I am confident, and decisive.
- My decisions are sound and well reasoned. I trust myself, because I am a capable, rational person, able to conquer problems with ease.
- I am allowed to enjoy the now, without worrying about the future, because in this moment everything is ok.
- I deserve peace. I am worthy of self love. I’m entitled to contentment.
- Everything is ok, was ok and will be ok.
- I am calm, knowing that when the time comes, I will successfully and peacefully deal with any and all issues. I can now fill my head with enjoyable thoughts and go relax.
Did you repeat those 10 times? If not, keep going. By the 3rd or 4th round, you will memorize some, and when that happens, I want you to close your eyes, and focus on the meaning of the words, and really sound them in to your core. Mean them, feel them, embrace them, own them. Now say them some more. Trust me. You are worthy of this time you are spending on yourself.
When done, go about your day. Leave the action plan behind until it is needed, if it even ever is (big if). It’s ok to let it go. Let your mind off the hook. You already have everything handled that you can possibly do now. Go now. Go on, enjoy yourself. Do something fun.